On losing my therapist

Last Wednesday I went to LWC for my bi weekly therapy appointment. As usual, 4pm on a Wednesday. I was looking forward to this session as I had new things to talk about. I needed to talk about. After some weeks of stagnation, I wanted to talk.

Checking in at the front desk, the receptionist has a horrified and concerned look on her face. “He doesn’t work here anymore.” I was crushed. In shock. Devastated. The receptionist was flustered and told me to wait so she could call someone I could talk to. I waited and a man came out, his replacement. He told me he was very busy and we could talk for a few minutes but then I had to go. I felt kind of numb and dumb. Honestly abandoned. I didn’t like this new man. His rushing me, my presence was a nuisance it seemed.

I still made an appointment for the following week.

I felt alone.

I question whether it is normal for me to feel so upset about losing my therapist. I am kind of angry. I feel like crying. Like something has been ripped from me and I get no say. It’s not my business where he went or why. But, where did he go, and why? Am I so insignificant that I can be left behind? I am grieving but is that OK? My heart feels a little heavy, but is that OK? Am I allowed to miss my therapist, or am I too attached?

I am hiding it. I am about to explode with tears.

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3 thoughts on “On losing my therapist

  1. Years ago, I lost a therapist. Saw him a few times, he went on vacation and then the office sends a letter notifying me that he died in a freak accident. Ummmmmm yeah. Very kind person. Talk about sudden and a slap in your face. His replacement , well, , he started slacking. Not showing up for appt.s , no explanation, no returned calls. Finally I left a message that I will no longer need his services. He never called back. I found a new therapist out of the same office and have had her for years. She told me he got fired.

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Well the one I ultimately have had for seven years or so, it was awkward and strange. I did not feel like starting over and found it as an annoyance more than anything. Nevertheless, I forced myself to move on. Little by little, it got easier once I felt like I could let my guard down and open up more. My advice, suffer less by moving forward with someone else. Let the past disappointments fade away.

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